HOW TO FIND HAPPINESS AND LOVE
- Do not depend on others to make you happy
Recognizing the true source of happiness is the first step in knowing how to find happiness in marriage. In many relationships, we are first attracted to another person just because they make us feel good about ourselves. But if we want the marriage to grow we need to realize that it would be unfair to make to make our spouse the prime source of our happiness. The highlight of a mature relationship is that each person thinks of what they can invest into the relationship rather than what they can harvest from it.
2. Learn to Forgive and forget.
There are lots of opportunities every day to be angry and offended. Some people take advantage of each opportunity and every day they go through life irritated and angry every day. There are lots of opportunities every day to be angry and offended with your spouse. Learn to forgive when you are offended by your spouse.
3. Believe the best.
Another step in knowing how to be find happiness in marriage is choosing only to believe the best about your spouse.
There was a story about a couple who had more than the normal disagreements. The couple wanted to make their marriage work, so they agreed on implementing an idea from the wife.
For about a month they decided to drop a slip into a “Fault” box. The box will provide a place to inform each other about daily irritations. The wife was very diligent in her approach and effort: “dirty socks not in hamper,” “wet towels on the shower floor,” “leaving the jelly top off the jar” on and on she went until the month came to an end. After dinner, they exchanged boxes and the husband reflected on his wrong doings. But when the wife opened her box and started reading, the message on each of the slips was the same and read, “I love you!”
4. Be in control of your feelings and thoughts:
Finding happiness in marriage begins with taking responsibility over ones thoughts and feelings. Have you ever said “He makes me very mad” or “I can’t help it, she just pushes my buttons.” The truth is that no one can make us mad. Being angry or rather, staying angry is a choice which you can make. It is in times of anger that actions are taken and words spoken which usually results in eternal damage to the relationship.
In most relationships, the source of any argument is because the spouse involved assumed the worst of each other in a specific situation.